Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici
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JUST THE FACTS
THE AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF CULINARY POLITICS-ELEMENTAL NEWS OF THE DAY COMMENTARY-OPINION-SPORTS-FOOD SERVICE FOR FRIDAY, DECEMBER 13, 2019 BY CHEF CRAIG “STINKBUG” CARRICI
“JTF: The results are in: here is the Top Eleven of the second round of semi-finals for the Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award- see what you think and let us know about it” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici
FALL SESSION 2019
BLOG POST #3,330 AT THE AICP-END
328 DAYS UNTIL ELECTION DAY 2020
The Democrats finally did it: launching articles of impeachment against President Trump…wow!
Pumpkin Center, CA 93313, 12-13-2019 Friday: Well, the Dems found their collective pair of gnarly, hairy, syphilitic balls this past Tuesday, strode to the assembled ranks of the waiting press corps and jumped the shark: TWO articles of impeachment against President Donald J. Trump, the first being ‘abuse of power’ and the second, ‘obstruction of Congress.’ Each of them looked glum and solemn, each of them looked sad and hurt that they had to undergo this but according to them, they had no choice other than to forge ahead, punish the president, and restore the nation’s tarnished honor. Then, two hours later, Speaker Nancy Pelosi said the House was going to pass the USMCA, the “U.S.-Mexico-Canada-Act,” the deal with which to replace the crumbling NAFTA and to put millions more Americans to work. Wow! The SOBS can walk and chew gum at the same time.
I imagine there are still a few million stupid people living in the United States, dolts who wholeheartedly believe that what the rabid Democrats say and the malarkey that spills out of their mouths, like rabbit pills out of the asses of jackrabbits, so enraptured of them are they. I am sure they slurp up all the yuck the Democrat chefs cook up in their garage, off-the-books kitchens, gobbling it up as though it is the finest cuisine this side of the Gaza Strip like the losers they are.
Well, like the New England Patriots and yet another Spygate scandal, this time their advance team just happening to film the sidelines of the Cincinnati Bengals- their next opponent- playing the Cleveland Browns this past week, there are always those who will disbelieve the evidence of their eyes.
Likewise, the Democrats are crapping on the entire country and I no more believe their claims of sincerity than I do the Patriots’ front office swearing on a stack of Bibles that (1) they had no clue as to WHAT THEIR people were doing, and (2) that they were not going to use the subsequent film to help them beat the Bengals. Uh-huh.
Yesterday, we shared the overall votes of the first round of semi-finals for the Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award. Today, we will share with you the Top Eleven of the nominees to see whom we will all be voting on this next week. Remember, you need 10 votes or more to qualify for the second round.
Here we go:
- Congressman Adam Schiff, chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, leads the list with a whopping 293 votes from our assembled families, employees, friends, and associates. No better person than he deserves to be at the top of our list. I will predict now- in my esteemed opinion- that he will be the one winning the sophomore award. I am betting my colleagues $500 a head that I am correct in our side pool.
- Congresswoman Ilhan Omar, freshman Democrat from the great state of Minnesota-Stan (LOL) who by all rules of the House should already being undergoing censure, if NOT expulsion, over the fact that she has misused campaign funds, had an illicit affair with a former campaign ‘employee,’ broke up the man’s marriage, as well as married one- if not two- brothers to get them into the country or to help her scam the Internal Revenue Service out of hundreds of thousands of dollars. Shame on her. She pulled a total of 215 votes making her No. 2 on the list.
- Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib: freshman Democrat from the once-prosperous state of Michigan-Stan known for being a foul-mouthed ho pulled in 129 votes. This woman, on the day of her 2018 Election victory told her assembled supporters- including her children and other kids- that we are going to go to Washington, D.C. and ‘impeach that motherf**ker.’ So much for being an open-minded, impartial individual, she was planning on impeaching President Trump from the moment she ran for office. She is one hateful female dog, folks.
- Surprisingly, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi comes in fourth with two fewer votes than Congresswoman Tlaib. With 127 votes, she still ranks fourth but many people feel queasy when it comes to bad-mouthing or belittling someone so clearly mentally challenged that many threw their votes elsewhere. Personally, I think she should be at least No. 2 but it is what it is, folks. Still, things can change between the final draw and today.
- Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the loveable wannabe Evita Peron, came in fifth with just 43 votes. Like some of the others, we thought she would come in higher because of ‘brain power,’ (well, truly the appalling lack of it) but many voters felt sorry for her because she has drunk so much of the toxic Kool-Aid® when it comes to fretting about climate change that they felt sorry for her. Still, she has campaign finance troubles of her own and should be undergoing censure, too, as we speak. We shall see.
- Senator Elizabeth Warren comes in with 33 votes. Unlike some of the others whom the voters chose to give a pass, people zeroed in on her being a big liar when it comes to claiming Cherokee heritage (remember: 1,124th ancestry or so her hired genealogist said) as well as the fact that she cannot bring herself to say that she is going to tax the living f**k out of the middle class to come up with the $30 trillion M-F’ing dollars to pay for Medicare for All.
- Daniel Goldman, the stuffed shirt, jackass attorney who appeared as both a lawyer and an inquisitor on Monday’s show trial hearings received the next highest number of votes coming in at 29. I imagine that if we see more of this garden slug over the subsequent weeks, he could increase his totals but if the Democrats are smart and wave him a fond farewell back to the basement at MSNBC, he might not. Personally, I think the guy is little more than a lice-ridden skunk, doing the jobs of both Schiff and Nadler because they lack the testicular fortitude to do things themselves. We shall see.
- Next on the coveted list for the second round of semi-finals is Utah freshman senator and former Massachusetts governor, the illustrious Mitt Romney. Every time I see impeachment discussed; people ask Republican senators ‘if they will lose any votes in the Senate at the conclusion of the impeachment trial.’ They all say “NO” but we know this skunk will drive a dagger yet again into the back of the 45th It is what it is. All told, he received 25 votes.
- Congressman Eric Swalwell comes in ninth with a mere 19 votes. Sheesh, the loser can’t even win enough votes to be at the head of the pack. Still, between here and next week, you never know what might happen. He could go up; then again, he could go farther down. We shall see.
- The basement dweller of this year’s Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award is fired Trump-hating and Obama-loving ambassador to the Ukraine, Marie Yovanovitch. She has a BIG 17 votes. Many expect her to disappear by next week.
- In the floor sink of the basement, our final contestant is in, Congressman Jerrold Nadler with 15 votes. Remember: to get in the running, you have to earn 10 votes or more to qualify.
Well, there you go, the Big Eleven for the next round of votes. Things can change over the course of a week so we shall see what we will see. I hope you will join us throughout this month as we plow forward to the BIG DAY when we present the award.
See you tomorrow and let’s see what happens to the Patriots- if anything. What a sham.
American Bakers’ Association, ACF, CWC
I am your talented chef-host, back in the 1980’s when I was the sous chef of a large food service operation in Bakersfield, CA. I began my cooking career in the 1960’s when I apprenticed underneath a great chef, Master Chef Ulysses S. Paz. I have lived and worked in Hawaii, Washington State, Arizona, and California. Even though I am in my late 60s, I am still actively involved at a hotel here in Bakersfield, CA.
Chef Stinkbug writes from Pumpkin Center, California.
Chef Stinkbug is a Conservative Ronald Reagan Republican.
Contact me at email@example.com
CHEF CRAIG “STINKBUG” CARRICI
END COMMENTARY 12-13-2019
COPYRIGHT © 2019 BY MHB PRODUCTIONS
WORD COUNT: 1,309
12-13-2019 Friday—Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXVII: “The results are in: here is the Top Eleven of the second round of semi-finals for the Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award- see what you think and let us know about it” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici.
HOW TO CONTACT THE AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF CULINARY POLITICS-ELEMENTAL NEWS OF THE DAY: Write us at PO Box 20669, Bakersfield, CA 93390-0669 or call us at (661) 374-1430 between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 8:00 p.m. PST weekdays and weekends, well, take your chances. You can also email us by contacting the author of the week using his or her email address, which we provide beneath their personal information.
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Carrici, Craig. “The results are in: here is the Top Eleven of the second round of semi-finals for the Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award- see what you think and let us know about it.” Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXVII
FOR FURTHER READING:
01-10-2018 W: “Although we attempt to avoid talking politics here, we generally do, which is why I say the liberals in our country require a ‘Lavrentiy Beria’ to show them the way” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Beverly Carrick Paintings Start-to-Finish, Part CLXXXIII
11-29-2018 Th: “Next month, the AICP-END Blogs will release the name of the winner for our First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award; I go over some of the nominees today and explain why they are on our list” by Chef Olaf Bologolo. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCXXXVIII
11-30-2018 F: “Next month, the AICP-END Blogs will release the name of the winner for our First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award; I go over the remaining nominees today and explain why each one is on our list” by Chef Olaf Bologolo. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCXXXIX
12-01-2018 S: “The final list of contestants for the First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award appear today and boy, do we have some winners on the list like Hillary Clinton, Jeff Flake, and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez” by Chef Olaf Bologolo. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCXL
12-14-2018 Th: “The Results are in for Round One of the Semi-Finals for the First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award are in- check them out!” by Chef Roland Carl Davis. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCLII
12-20-2018 Th: “Round Two of the Semi-Finals for the First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award are in: Michael Avenatti holds first place!” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCLIX
12-27-2018 Th: “We have arrived at the Top Three contenders for the First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award, which we will award NEXT Thursday” by Moses Scharbug III. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCLXVI
01-03-2019 Th: “We announce the winners of the First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award today: outgoing California Governor Jerry Brown and current Attorney-General Xavier Becerra” by Moses Scharbug III. Political Topics and Essays, Part MDCLXXIII
12-09-2019 M: “The Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award begins today what with the first group of entrants vying for the prize” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXIII
12-10-2019 T: “The Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award’s second grouping of contestants is here today, some you might know and expect, some for a second time, whereas others could be a complete surprise” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXIV
12-11-2019 W: “To catch the readership up, we revisit last year’s First Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award so you can see who was in the running, how we tallied the votes, and the final top three winners” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXV
12-12-2019 Th: “The Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria First Semi-Finals votes appear today with some expected names appearing among the finalists” by Chef Craig “Stinkbug” Carrici. Political Topics and Essays, Part MMXVI
Edward “Eddie” Fitzgerald Carlton edited and rewrote the blog post today.
The Stinkbug symbol on CDs, DVDs, and Books means “approved by the American Institute of Culinary Politics-Elemental News of the Day” as well as adjusted or edited by the photographic editor.
Political Topics and Essays, Craig Carrici, Second Annual Lavrentiy Beria Award, Adam Schiff, Nancy Pelosi, Jerrold Nadler, Eric Swalwell, Marie Yovanovitch, Mitt Romney, Elizabeth Warren, Ilhan Omar, Rashida Tlaib, Daniel Goldman, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, AOC, Baby Evita, Evita Peron, The New England Patriots, The Cincinnati Bengals, Spygate,
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